Starting A new Me

Whoa!!! Everyone has been telling me I lost weight which is so weird cos I think I gained...well anyways...I went and chopped my usually long looks about 2 months ago...and I love it though I miss my long hair....

Now to my love life...hmmm what can i say about it?? well I have too many guys at the moment...I just have to pick one I truly like and stick with him....

Well that's all for now...I'll try to write every week or whenever I have the chance....

xoxo

Pain and Suffering

why do i feel that you're gone? i wanted to see you but something was in the way...i didn't wanna let you go...It hurts to see you even if it's for the last time...i cant keep my tears from falling for you..even if you're not mine to have I'll still love you as if you were mine...please take care of my heart cos u don't wanna give it back to me...don't break it return it when u come back...i will always love you..i wont forget you...

Can you not break my heart?

You said you had to leave...I begged you to stay..in the end I finally said ok but asked you if i can have my heart back cos you stole it from me...You said you'll keep it cos it's your sweetest memory of me...I told you to pls take care of my heart and you said ok...But how do I know that you won't just break it and throw it away? Can I really trust you not to break it? Not to forget me and how much we mean to each other? Keep catching raindrops so you can show me how much I mean to you...

It's all about you

I didn't wanna think about you leaving but as the days pass by, I guess I have to come to terms of it...It's painful to know that I won't see you around anymore and that the smile I love so much won't brighten my days anymore...couldn't you just stay awhile more and not leave me behind?? I love how you make me smile and forget all my worries...Thank you for making realize that life is worth living and I'll never regret meeting you...Saranghaeyo...

My Letter to Someone special

I never really got over you he said to me..I saw it all in his eyes..The emotions spilling out...I didn't know what to say..I know in my heart that I still love him but can I trust myself to be trust him again after what he did to me??
Things were never normal between us..He cheated on me with my best friend while I was flirting with his brother but he's all I ever wanted in my life and I regret losing him..I wish he was still mine to hold, kiss and hug but he's not...He belongs to someone else he loves now..He was,is, my whole life...I just don't know how to tell him after I told him I'm over him...This whole note is for him..I hope he reads this and know how strong my feelings are for him..I can't do anything about this emotions I have for him cos I know he'll never feel same way again..It's so hard to hide these feelings from him as I miss him all the time now that I don't see him everyday...Love is unconditional..He's all I want and all I'll ever need..
Sometimes I hoped things will be the same way it was when we were together..I was so happy then..I didn't have a care in the world all I need and ever wanted was with him...I miss his hugs and kisses...They were filled with love only meant for me...But now it's all gone for we've grown apart...Is it wrong to still love you even though you see me as sister now? Do you remember what happened to us? I do..It's still vivid in my mind...The silence and ignoring each other...It took us months to be social to each other...It was practically a hostile situation for us..We barely talked and that sucks cos you were my best friend as well as my boyfriend...I know I shouldn't feel this way now that you think someone replaced you in my heart but no matter what happens you'll always be in my heart..
You're the love I regretted losing till now...You're still my one and only love..If only I can turn back time just to be your girl again..We were so happy then but now all I want is for you to be happy with whoever you want...Love your girlfriend as you have loved me..And she'll be happy...Just know that I still love you with all my heart...

Looking back

I've finally got it right...Is it too hard for you to understand that my heart belongs to someone else and I'm happy with him....This wasn't meant to be happening to me...That past life of mine is over..Don't bring it up anymore...I've changed and so have you...So just please let me go my own way and you on your own...You've been there for me even when I don't need support to move on...Let go of me and you'll see that I wasn't meant for you...My life has never been with you or revolved around you...I only see you as a friend and brother...I'm not that girl that you fell in love with 6, 7 years back...I grew up...All I ever wanted was for you to be happy with someone else who isn't me..Cos I'm happy with all the people around me...I'm so sorry but I don't need you anymore in my life...

Confusion

It's finally here. The memory box a friend sent me years ago. I know it seems weird that I'm only getting it now but we made a pact that we'll always be there for each other...What sucks about it all is that she has to leave me in the middle of all this chaos in our lives..I miss her..She didn't really send me the box years ago..We made a point to send our memory box if anything happens to us..so when I got mine imagine my shock when mine arrived this morning...I broke down and called her mom..I found out she's gone for almost 5 days now...Is it faith that lead to her death? or Is it just her time?